Self-aggrandizement.

OK, I am well aware that no one really likes to hear too much about the good stuff going on in my life but, you're going to have to bear with me. I RAN 10 MILES YESTERDAY!!! Add to that, I don't feel half bad today and you've got a party looking for a place to happen.

Yesterday was going to be my big test. It was a scheduled 10 mile run with my training group: T2 End AIDS. I had no expectation for actually completing the run. I had run 6 miles last Saturday so I expected to run 8 miles yesterday. That would have put me on course to catch up with my training group next week when we're scheduled for a short 5 mile run. Well, I don't know what got into me but I decided to give the 10 miles a shot. What's the worst that could happen? Well, there's failure but, I know that it's never failure to try.

The run went beautifully. The weather was wonderful and I really like the ladies that are in my time group. There is always good conversation. I have a couple of new apps on my phone. HIIT Interval Training and Sports Tracker.

H.I.T lets me program custom interval training times. We're running 4/1 and the coach's whistle the app uses seems to be very motivating.Sports Tracker is just too cool for words. It uses the GPS chip in my phone to collect information on my runs. I have the free app so it's just basic information gathered by the GPS: speed, route, time, etc. When I get a Bluetooth enabled heart rate monitor I'll do the paid upgrade so it will also give me information on calorie burn, heart rate, whether I'm having a stroke, etc. It will also download information into Facebook (Look, John's on the verge of collapse! And we can see it in real time.) And to think, we used to have to take our own pulse for 15 seconds and multiply by 4. Barbaric times they were. OK, back to it...

I ended up being the pacer for our group. The H.I.T. app kept us on schedule. While it's just a guess I think the fact that I was suddenly in charge of the group's timing really struck a cord with my body. I became more than just about me, I became about us, our little group of four. Not making the 10 miles was no longer an option. If I failed, who'd make the timing calls? This is probably why I'm usually the Purser on flights. I'm at my best when I'm responsible for something. If I'm going to put myself out there, I'm going to make sure I perform. I knew things were going to end well when one of the women who had been running next to me pointed out that I kept speeding up and it was driving her crazy. This was around mile 7. I realized she was right and slowed my pace down. I also realized I was going to make it for the whole 10 miles.

At the end of the run we were greeted and congratulated. Deleting stops for water and the toilet, we were right on time. I called Russell to pick me up. I am so proud of all of us. During the run we shared stories. One lady's father had died of AIDS in 1986. AZT was it at the time. I told her that when I finally began treatment I was one of the 1% who couldn't take AZT because, at the common dosages of the time, I had a psychotic reaction. I couldn't take the damn stuff. When the protease inhibitors came around, though, my life changed dramatically.

I had no immune system to speak of and was just trying my best to remain generally healthy and upbeat. I managed to get on a study for Crixivan. While it wasn't a home run for me, it did show that I could still show signs of an immune system. My t-cells went from the single digits to 60. Yeah, I know, not earth shattering unless you look at the percentage. 5 to 60 is a, what, 900 percent jump? When the study opened up, meaning we were released from the confines of the study and could add other drugs into the mix I tossed in, I believe, 3TC. I had read a number of articles that said people were seeing some interesting results by mixing different classes of drugs. This is when my immune system broke loose and began to rebuild at a rapid pace. It is one of the reasons I am here today. There are many others but a new, from the ground up, immune system gets the lion's share of credit. It was also the beginning of the multi-drug therapy that is the common tactic today.

I'm not what you would call a religious man. My beliefs are scattered and varied. I do believe that we all hold responsibilities towards the greater good. I write as a way to reach out. I know there are those who would shy away from me as they find out more about me. I also know that as someone who is relatively isolated from the negatives that life likes to hand out, I bear a responsibility. I must step up and be noticed so those who feel they cannot risk notice will know it's OK. I tell my story as a way to share hope. I've seen the worst and know it's all survivable. HIV won't ruin your life, cancer can be beaten and bones heal. I know it's all very easy when your well insured, have a supportive partner and income. Yet so much of it is not dependent on tangible things. Go at life head-on. Gather your friends and your spirituality. Surround yourself with life and never give up. Live open and free. Survive!